Are you Willing to Carry Your Spouse's Destiny?

Adapt yourself to the things among which your lot has been cast and love sincerely the fellow creatures with whom destiny has ordained that you shall live.

Marcus Aurelius

I have been having this discussion with good friends of mines and I thought why not share with the women of immarriednow.com

If I could pick a subtitle for this blog it would be Interceding for you husbands. We as Women (Saved or Un-saved) have a duty to uplift our husbands daily because of the daily activities a Man has to go through. (And trust this goes both ways). In Genesis 2:18 it states that the woman is suppose to be a HELP MEET for the man. And that just does not consist of cooking and cleaning. It means that at times, certain things that we may wants at the time we must put on hold because the head of our family needs us spiritually more right now than a want. But even as we carry or even push our husbands into their destiny/calling we are also being molded for what is to come for us.

You need to pray for your husband's destiny to be birthed if it has not been; pray that his God given vision should be established; pray for him to be focused; pray for him not to fall into error; pray for his deliverance if in any form of bondage; pray for favor upon his job or business; pray for him to have good health; pray for protection etc. Rather than compete with your husband or judge and criticize him, it is always beneficial if you go on your knees to intercede for him.

We as wives see certain things that our husband cant see or at the time may not see because of daily tasks that comes with him. It is our job to pray for that vision. When we took our vows we told God that He could trust us with his blessing, our husbands. Because he is head we must protect the head of our house by praying for him because he feels most of the pressure because he is the provider. Face it, He is Big Daddy lol.

Lets say that in your home right now you are the bread winner, you pray for your husbands "ego". Pray that God gives him the peace and the understanding and you still let him know that he is needed and is the head of the house.

Here are some scriptures and declarations:

As it is written in Isaiah 60:1 – I prophesy into your life – ARISE AND SHINE FOR YOUR LIGHT IS COME

– IN YOUR CAREER ARISE
– IN YOUR BUSINESS ARISE
– IN YOUR SPIRITUAL LIFE
– IN YOUR MINISTRY ARISE IN YOUR FINANCES ARISE, IN JESUS NAME
As it is written in Isaiah 45 – I prophesy into your life –
 The Lord will hold your right hand;
 Subdue nations before you
 Loose the armors of kings for you
 Open before you the double doors of favour wherever you go
 Give unto you the treasures of darkness
 Give you the hidden riches of secret places.
As it is written in Isaiah 8:10 - Every counsel of the enemy over your life will come to nothing in Jesus name.
Every conspiracy against you on your job, business in your family will not prosper in Jesus name.
Father separate my husband from evil friends and evil influences in Jesus name. IT IS WELL WITH YOU ALL THE DAYS OF YOUR LIFE IN JESUS NAME

So as women, strong women, independent women of the 21st century, lets built our men up. Pray for them. And trust when we do our parts, we will get all our wants and need. From God and our husbands!!

Forgiving Your Past to Live in your Marriage

My dear friends, I'm not writing anything new here. This is the oldest commandment in the book, and you've known it from day one. It's always been implicit in the Message you've heard. On the other hand, perhaps it is new, freshly minted as it is in both Christ and you—the darkness on its way out and the True Light already blazing!

~1 John 2:7-8(MSG)

Hey lovelies! Its been a while since I last wrote and I apologize for that. Charge it to my head and not my heart. Trust I never forget about you all :-)

Let me just say that these next blogs to follow will be that of a personal testimony and very transparent. Not saying that I wasn't speaking from experience before but you get my drift.

In January of 2002 I was raped behind my apartment building. I was coming home from after school rehearsal. One thing that haunted me was that one thing he said to me when he finished was, "You are a nobody who is being raped by somebody who will rape your mind for the rest of your life." I kept it from my mom and my grandmother until April of that same year, but I never sought help because as I am very famous for doing, I planned on burying it along with other things that have buried. But of coarse, later on in life that back fired.

After I had my son, (who will 1 on the 23 by the way, time sure does fly) I went through postpartum depression so I started counseling....coming to find out that not was I only being affected by postpartum but also post traumatic stress disorder.

Because I never dealt with being raped or seeking the professional help that was needed, certain actions began to make up my personality. Being overly nervous, not believing in myself and seeking the approval of others, because after all, "I was a nobody whose mind was being raped by somebody".

So a lot of my actions towards my husband were that of what was done to me. A lot of time us as "spiritual" beings tend to sweep stuff under the rug and think that God will take care of it, but at the same time, he has given us people here on this earth to help with the dealings. Emotionally, even though I would give my life for my husband, there was still a part of me that I could not give because of my "mind being raped"

In order for my mind to no longer be raped by this man who took something from me, marked me, I had to forgive him. In order for me to move on in my life and give my husband everything that he deserves from me, I had to forgive the man who had done this to me. Once I let go of what was then and realized that is okay now,....I saw my future life.

I say all of this to say, To LIVE in your Marriage, you have to FORGIVE your past. We have all been hurt in some way but in order to be YOU and give YOU you must FORGIVE. We have actions and tendencies that honestly are not who we are, they are of that person who has done something to us and we take it out on the wrong people. It always ends up being the person that is closest to us.

You Must Forgive to Live!

So I challenge you today to look at yourself and see the things that are honestly not you and search to see where they came from. And if you cant, seek the help that you need. There is nothing wrong with seeing someone for help. That is what they are here for.

Wife, Mommy & Student and Loving It?

Lets go down memory lane.....

In April of 2009 I met my best friend and soul mate

In July of 2009 I married my best friend and soul mate

In November of 2009 we received good news that we were having a baby

In June of 2010 Our son was born

In November of 2010 I started school

Now in December I have added another role to my job, Wife, Mother & Student and Loving It! or Am I?....

My first job is to be a Wife and Mother. Its it is not an easy job but its worth it! Then to add going to school on top of that....WHOOSH! You talk about time management. But even with managing time, with a newborn its not that simple. Both my babies (husband and son) require a lot of attention, but isn't that what I signed up for?

There are times where I wish I could jut go into a room and just sit there and no one would find me, can ask me to clean, cook, wash clothes, type papers, submit assignments, just gone to the world! But then I think would I really like being alone without all my "jobs"?

You know its so easy to say that we want to obtain certain goals in our life, but the work that must go into those goals are not always easy and I am learning that day by day. I love to hear stories of the elderly couples who have been married for years and yet they still have the look in their eyes as if they first met. Then to talk to the wife, and how she tells her stories of them. But what I love the most is the realness of the stories. They never tell you that it is easy and that they is no remedy or handbook for being a wife and a mother, its something you just learn along the way. And the more you learn the more you love.

So do I love being a Wife, Mommy & Student....YOU BET CHA BY GOLLY WOW!

Postpartum Depression

A lot of people don't realize that depression is an illness. I don't wish it on anyone, but if they would know how it feels, I swear they would think twice before they shrug.

~Johnathan Davis

Being a wife is such a wonderful thing. It comes with duties that maybe tasking at times but its a love and desire that makes it all worth it. Then here come motherhood. This is a whole other feeling in itself. Its such a beautiful feeling. To have someone who needs you for literally everything, sleepless night, doctor appointments, and those wonderful poopy diapers...lol. Then when you add those two jobs together it becomes a responsibility that is one of hard work, sacrifice, and unconditional love. At times it can be overbearing, but its all worth it in the end.

I thought I would talk about postpartum depression because honestly I am dealing with a slight case of it.

Postpartum Depression:

a phychiatric disorder consisting of severe depression that can affect a woman soon after giving birth.

We have all heard stories of mothers who have literally killed their children because of this severe disorder. You know I must admit, I can't see how you can hurt something so innocent but I would lie if I said that the sadness or heavy feeling that the world is caving in isn't there. Its hard to write about this because I'm not one who is having the thoughts of hurting my child or ignoring my child. My son means everything to me and my life is not worth more than his. His safety and health comes before mines and I would lay down my life for my child. But I would be lying if I said that its not hard at times.

My hormones are crazy right now. Mixed emotions on everything...lol. Seriously, one minute I am happy go lucky the next I am so sad. There is so much that I would love to be doing right now but do to some things that are beyond my control (not dealing with my son) I cant do those things. It makes me sad because I feel incompetent. Like I'm not a good mother and wife. Like I'm worthless and am bringing nothing to the table. Even so bad that I may have a thought that my husband and son would be better off without me. Like maybe I move somewhere else. Crazy huh? Yeah that's what I say when I snap out of it. But I realize because of these hormones, my thoughts run completely out of control.

You never know how serious it is until you go through it. It really is life changing and makes you grateful for a lot. It really helps to talk to someone and even write it out. I love my husband so much because he listens and helps and prays with me and for me. I'm grateful that I don't have to go through this alone. And most of all I'm so thankful for my son. He is my everything and I cant imagine my life without him or my husband.

Love you guys and to let you all know writing these blogs are therapeutic for me and as I help someone I am helping myself. Be Blessed all :-)

I was Jake (now I'm married) Sex, Love & Life: glamour.com

I came across this and thought it was good enough to share...

I was Jake (now I'm married) Sex, Love & Life: glamour.com

New Baby in the Family!

Everyone join me in congratulating Dani on the arrival of her first born baby boy! Larry III was born last night at 10:15 pm in Georgia and weighed in at 6 lbs and 6 oz. He's adorable (I saw the pix!). Mother and baby are doing fine. Congratulations Mr. and Mrs. Harold Jr.!!!