The "O" word in marriage...

Some may say it's the "S" word and others may flat out call it slavery, but I'm referring to OBEDIENCE and SUBMISSION. I know you all are getting fired up with me...especially since this blog is for all those young fabulous 21st century women out there, but hear me out and then comment.

Let's start with some definitions....

Obedience:
- the act of obeying; dutiful or submissive behavior with respect to another person
- the trait of being willing to obey

Submission:

- the act of submitting; usually surrendering power to another
- the condition of having submitted to control by someone or something else; "the union was brought into submission"; "his submission to the will of God"
- meekness: the feeling of patient, submissive humbleness

http://www.wordnetweb.princeton.edu/perl/webwn

So when us women hear people say that we must be obedient or submissive to our husbands I think we all have a tendency to roll our eyes or prepare for a debate. I'll admit that I may be number one to do those exact things depending on whose mouth it is coming from. Some of you may think that obedience is obedience and submission is submission, but it is NOT! I will not be submitting myself to an abusive man whether or not he is my husband. I will not submit myself to an ungodly man...whether or not he is my husband. But you see the key here is whether or not he is a GODLY man. The idea of being obedient comes from the bible (at least in my personal beliefs) and I for one do not think that God will outright contradict himself by expecting a wife to be submissive to a man that is not of God. Let me elaborate. When I talk to my sisters about obedience in marriage I refer to scripture, "Wives, be subject to your husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the Church. (Eph. 5:22-23)". When most people read this they hold on to "be subject to your husbands, as to the Lord." where as when I read this I see, "...even as Christ is the head of the Church." You see, God likened the husband's role in the marriage to that of Christ in the church and if my husband is leading my marriage and my household like Christ does the church (with love, humility, meeting all of the needs of the church, sacrificing his life, and so on...), then why wouldn't I want to give him the best of me? Why wouldn't I want to please him? Keep in mind however, that it does not stop there...

The bible also instructs the husband to give his wife what she needs. In fact here are 13 biblical instructions for husbands:

1) Love your wife as Christ loved the church. Give yourself up for your wife. (Ephesians 5:25)

2) Love your wife in the same way you love your body and yourself. (Ephesians 5:28-33)
3) Be considerate as you live with your wife. (I Peter 3:7)
4) Do not be harsh with your wife. (Colossians 3:19)
5) Your body belongs to your wife. (I Corinthians 7:3-5)
6) Rejoice in your wife. Let her breasts satisfy you. Be captivated with her. (Proverbs 5:18-19)
7) Ensure that other men do not "enjoy" your wife in public places. (Proverbs 5:16)
8) Do not be captivated by other women (Proverbs 5:20)
9) Praise your wife. (Proverbs 31:28-29)
10) Tell your wife how captivated you are with her body (Song of Solomon, esp 4:7; 7:1-8)
11) Honor your marriage; keep it pure by remaining true to your wife in every way (Heb 13:4)12) Be thankful for your wife and realize the favor you have received from God. (Prov 18:22)
13) Be "one flesh" with your wife in every way. (Matthew 19:5)

Courtesy of: http://www.eadshome.com/husbands.htm

I share all of this simply to say...Go ahead and be submissive to your husbands. If your man is fulfilling his biblical duties to you and God, then there should be no hesitation and complete peace of mind.